When I was living in Japan I went on a scream-inducing date with a very strange Japanese man. I met him at a Christmas party at a Mexican restaurant. After we had finished our burritos we poured all the leftover alcohol into a plastic bag so as not to waste precious resources on our way to a club, because that’s the sort of classy way we roll. Once we got outside a friend held the edges of the bag tightly, and poured its contents into my mouth. Naturally, it went all over my head, and I was left quite literally red faced and sticky, covered head to toe in sangria. A kind Japanese man came to help me mop it off. He turned out to be the restaurant owner.

The next week I went on a date with the restaurant owner. He called me, and we arranged to meet at an Omotesando junction. He was 45 minutes late- I don’t know why I waited- and when he eventually arrived, threw me into his white Range Rover, turned on very loud music and asked me which of his five restaurants I wanted to eat at. He was the first Japanese person I had met who didn’t help me play charades when I couldn’t remember the correct Japanese word. He wanted to be in charge, and didn’t seem remotely phased by my clear displeasure. He seemed, even, to enjoy himself, and suggested we meet again. I wriggled out of his clutches and went to meet a friend.

Let’s not tar every Japanese man with the same brush. God knows, terrible dates take place all around the globe. Yet before I even contemplated meeting this man I knew that some things about dating in Japan were unusual. Christmas Eve is given over not to carols but to dating, for example. Girls can guarantee themselves chocolates simply by giving the same to every man of their acquaintance on Valentines Day. Come White Day, all males are required to reciprocate the handout to the women from whom he has received. These facts I was told and duly accepted.

Sitting in the restaurant owner’s 4×4 I wondered if I had inadvertently stumbled across the world of compensated dating, the strangest of the dating myths I had heard. Definitions vary but the crux of compensated dating is that an older male pays for a younger woman’s lifestyle in return for her time and companionship. This might also include sexual favours. On the flipside it seems totally acceptable to complain about ones sugar daddy; his not so natty toupé, the shitty presents he buys from Cartier, his age.

Every girl I made friends with in Japan expressed some desire to get married, whether now or in the not so distant future. Certainly none of these Japanese girls were into compensated dating. However, a great number of them worked at a prosperous Tokyo law firm, and a great number admitted it was a good place to work because the chances of finding a financially secure husband were high.

Granted, every relationship involves a transaction of kind, and perhaps the only difference between the British and Japanese attitude is a prudish covering up of motives in the case of the former; ignore “my intelligence for your good looks” because we’ll only settle for luuurve. Just substitute Blair’s Babes for the so-called Princess Corps, who make up a tawdry 11.3% of the new DPJ government, and the situations don’t look so different after all.

Curry rice

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Minced meat croquets

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Fruits with agar jelly

One of the many many myths the Japanese have managed to export is that they live only off tofu and squid sashimi, which is why they live so long and aren’t fat. (Their life expectancy is higher then other Western countries because of the superb pre-natal care which means Japan’s infant mortality rate is virtually nil. Skinny because of breeding amongst themselves for 1000 years, where only about 5% of the population were allowed to eat anything other than meagre servings of milled barley.)

Curry rice is a staple dish here, most people eating it at least twice a week at home, it being cheap, easy to make and filling. It’s strange because it’s not even a second hand dish, but third, having been brought by the English around the turn of the century. It’s a thick, sweet, gravy-like sauce with the faintest hint of curry powder and no spice. Usually has potato, carrots and meat. Pretty much gross. Tons of MSG probably. So moreish.

It is amazing to see how grown adults get so unbelievably excited on curry days, shovelling third helpings into their mouths with small spoons. I always sit next to the maths teacher (male and female teachers usually eat separately), Matsumoto-Sensei, who is the most cartoon looking of the teachers. Absolutely enormous, with a huge square head, an unruly tuft of hair and tiny circular glasses, he looks like an overgrown baby. He has one of those mischievous faces which is always dripping with sweat, and a massive, overly tight belly. All the teachers double up as sports club coaches, and he does basketball, so he’s always got these long sports shorts pulled up over his belly button which only accentuates his symmetrically square frame and flat buttocks. I think he went for sixths today.

]]> http://www.murdofleur.org/notice-board/the-underbelly-of-japanese-cuisine/feed 2 http://www.murdofleur.org/post-its/post-it-notes/murdofleurs-top-5-tremendously-evocative-but-basically-nonsensical-engrish-titles-of-japanese-sega-games-1997-1998 http://www.murdofleur.org/post-its/post-it-notes/murdofleurs-top-5-tremendously-evocative-but-basically-nonsensical-engrish-titles-of-japanese-sega-games-1997-1998#comments Mon, 23 Nov 2009 18:57:23 +0000 Robert Gallagher http://www.murdofleur.org/?p=3631 1. Silhouette Mirage (Treasure, 1997)

2. Panzer Dragoon Saga (Team Andromeda, 1998)

3. Elevator Action Returns (Taito, 1997)

4. Radiant Silvergun (Treasure, 1998)

5. Devil’s Castle Dracula X – Nocturne in the Moonlight (Konami, 1998)

]]> http://www.murdofleur.org/post-its/post-it-notes/murdofleurs-top-5-tremendously-evocative-but-basically-nonsensical-engrish-titles-of-japanese-sega-games-1997-1998/feed 0 http://www.murdofleur.org/post-its/post-it-notes/japanning http://www.murdofleur.org/post-its/post-it-notes/japanning#comments Sun, 22 Nov 2009 18:30:38 +0000 Dorothy http://www.murdofleur.org/?p=3542 Murdofleur: Japanning? What’s that then, navigating your way across Japan with only a compass and a bag of liquorice allsorts?

Alex: Oh no. Japanning is a word that originated in the 17th century, used to describe the European imitation of Asian lacquerwork originally used on furniture.

Do tell me more.

Think of ladies in bombazine dresses being brought tea on spindly trays with rectangular corners and bevelled edges, and black lacquerwork inlaid with mother of pearl pagodas: to me, japanning is the height of gentility.

Well, that says more than a little about you.

A tray is of course an interesting concept in itself: a moveable table. If madam will not go to the table, then the table will be brought to madam.

So Japanning is another example of the ‘exotic’ as condiment to the domestic sphere?

Yes, although furniture had been brought back to Europe by Dutch traders since the 16th century, japanning was a home-grown craft. In fact the fashion was fuelled from – of all places – Pontypool, a small town in South Wales. Pontypool was founded on the iron industry and it was the first place to introduce a rolling mill to create plate that was very smooth and thin. Experiments with coating the iron sheet in tin and varnish resulted in a rust-resistant and hard-wearing surface. I’m a fan.

]]> http://www.murdofleur.org/post-its/post-it-notes/japanning/feed 0 http://www.murdofleur.org/post-its/post-it-notes/from-the-eaves-i-wii-are-your-friends http://www.murdofleur.org/post-its/post-it-notes/from-the-eaves-i-wii-are-your-friends#comments Sun, 22 Nov 2009 18:10:03 +0000 Jago Boase http://www.murdofleur.org/?p=3562

Guidance: contains language which may offend.

Alfred: Bob, could you check my application? Don’t worry, it’s short.
Bob: Sure, what’s it for?
A: Travel grant. Japan.
B: Holiday?
A: Basically, but it’s also the final part of my D of E Gold Award.
B: Why Japan? I mean, you don’t want to stay there too long, you’ll go all ‘slitty-eyed.’
A: Ha, yes, except, isn’t that China?
B: Is it? Aren’t they both…?
A: No, that is, I’m pretty sure only one is. There was a mnemonic my mother taught me to tell them apart, but I always forgot it.
B: Anyway, yeah cool. When are you going?
A: June/July. It’s not finalised.
B: Are you taking your GF?
A: Um, no, basically, I think it could be a bit awkward.
B: Yeah, that’s why I asked. Because aren’t they meant to be pretty racist out there?
A: True, but also, well, I mean… I’ve never actually… but I’ve always wanted to… apparently they cry.
B: What, they cry if they see a black person?
A: No, when you – you know. When you fuck them. Girls smell really nice when they cry.

B: Really? And that’s, that’s good is it? I mean it happened to me once and it wasn’t much fun.

A: This is different, they’re pretending. It’s part of that whole manga rape fantasy thing.
B: Woah! I didn’t rape her.
A: Of course, of course.
B: It was just the morning after the morning after, and she came down really hard.
A: Ok, sure, I know.
B: Do people think…
A: No, of course not. Look I’ve got to go, but could you just have a skim through that and tell me what you think? It’s just the usual guff about different philosophic traditions and how this manifests itself in everyday life, boring boring, etc.
B: Sure, I’ll glance at it, let you know if there are any solenoids.
A: Great, thanks. I’ll see you later. Actually, wait a sec., what?

—-

The Eavesdropper prefers to remain anonymous.

I’m joined this episode by Marc Halatsis and Tina Parte to discuss Japan, media and fandom, in a chat that ranges from Western Japanophiles’ love for (an often grotesquely lopsided and reductive version of) the country’s pop culture to C19th vogues for accesorising kimono with European batwing umbrellas to Japanese girls’ love for the ephebic fantasy boys of bishōnen or ’beautiful boy love’ manga.

We audibly eat chestnuts, talk about how nebulous ‘Japaneseness’ as a concept is and trace some of the fascinating loops and involutions chains of East/West cultural exchange are subject to. We also play some music – expect Pan-Pacific improv, Japanese reworkings of the Stones and Street Fighter II-sampling ‘ardcore homages.  There’s more East/West musical love-ins on the playlist, too: post-dubstep bass musics <3 Japanese beat ‘em ups, hip hop <3 taiko percussion and Bjork <3 her vaseline-happy artist hubby Matthew Barney – it’s from her soundtrack to his Drawing Restraint 9 that the first track comes.

Incidentally the entire movie - wherein Barney metaphorises postwar US/Japanese relations by having he and Ms. Guðmundsdóttir conduct an arcane nuptial ceremony then hack each other’s limbs off and turn cetaceous – is on the other end of the hyperlink, which’ll be handy for anyone with a thing for Japanese kids vomiting squid…

Oh, and enjoy my new kitchen’s horrible acoustics!

Subscribe on iTunes

Spotify Playlist [link to spotify]

• Bjork and Bonny Prince Billy – Gratitude
• Zeena Parkins and Ikue Mori – Ghostlake
• Zomby – You Are My Fantasy (Street Fighter II Theme)
• Ricardo Villalobos and Andrew Gillings – Andruic & Japan
• Yuzo Koshiro – Shinobi Reverse
• Missy Elliott – Get Ur Freak On
• Boris – Woman on the Screen

]]> http://www.murdofleur.org/cassettes/macarthur/feed 5 http://www.murdofleur.org/postcards/japanophilia-could-be-anywhere http://www.murdofleur.org/postcards/japanophilia-could-be-anywhere#comments Sat, 21 Nov 2009 18:54:33 +0000 Dorothy http://www.murdofleur.org/?p=3445 ]]> Dorothy and Alice exchange picture post

In 1936, Kichizo Ishida, an innkeeper in the Tokyo suburbs, left his wife and began an affair with Sada Abe, one of the prostitutes in his employ. Kichi died in climax and Sada was put on trial for his murder. Nagisa Oshima’s film version of this legendary crime, In the Realm of the Senses (1976) acquired cult status, not least because it was widely banned (Oshima edited the footage in France to evade Japanese censorship laws). As a study in morbid obsession, the film moves relentlessly from sex scene to sex scene, leaving barely any room for narrative; it is repetitive and monotonous, rather than erotic. For me there is one moment in the film that is truly startling. Sada is on a train, parted briefly from Kichi, and she misses him so intensely that she has to go off and wrap herself in his kimono. This re-enactment of the ritual of dressing pierces the film’s vaguer of explicit nudity. Entirely enveloped in her own feelings, Sada wants to lose herself. You could be anywhere and need to put on that kind of kimono.

Dorothy Feaver

I  ♥ ♥ ♥ Japan

Anglophilia (Kagawa college car park, 2008)

Alice Feaver

Insigniaphilia: hearts on sleeves (Covent Garden, London, 2000)

Dorothy Feaver

Box of love. Osaka yen shop (2008)

Alice Feaver

my magic Japanese box: there’s nothing in it.

Dorothy Feaver

___

Great waves…

..potty craze.

One of the peccadillos among the Aesthetes of the late 19th century was a fetishization of Japanese design. This wave of drawing room Japanophilia boiled down to linear patterning, motifs of birds and branches, dark woods, and highly glazed and lacquered finishes, as seen in screens, paper fans, trays, teapots etc. – masterfully lampooned by George du Maurier in Punch.

Dorothy Feaver